Free The Pinto

“Bob Step Down” Written and performed by Strychnos Spinosa

30 years of Independence in Zimbabwe,
Colossal devastation in the hands of Rob Mugabe
Coalition government with Morgan Tsvangirai
What the hell you’re doin’…you just fakin’ without tryin’

Bob…step down…Instead of messing with our future…messing with Harare
Bob…step down….One day you will have to answer for the children of Zimbabwe
Bob…step down….Instead of messing with our future…Tell us no more lies
Bob….step down…One day you will have to answer to the Children of Skies

30 years of Independence in Zimbabwe,
Colossal devastation in the hands of Rob Mugabe
Coalition government with Morgan Tsvangirai
What the hell you’re doin’…you just faking without tryin’

I AM A TAR BABY FUNGUS by Strychnos Spinosa

I am a Tar Baby Fungus. A venom, creeping thru the night,

A Zimbabwean conundrum poised to give you a fright

I f you listen to my voice you will be paralyzed and sedated,

No matter who you are… intellectually challenged or educated

I am a question mark “Nga!” full of uncertainty, mystery and evil,

A bitter African Molasses Tokoloshe who will create in you a spiritual upheaval

I will scare you to death this Halloween October 31nth 2009,

And you will wish that you hadn’t seen or heard me on this site…

I will pillage your villages and steal your sweet little children,

Torment you in your sleep husbands, wives, brothers and sistren

Do not, I repeat.  Do not provoke this Nubian caramel Mandigo,

For he will circumcise your spirit, your will, and your soul…

So to all those Homo Sapien cowards and war mongers who wish ill of me,

I will cook you for food and have your antigenic blood for tea

I am the smelly buttock cheeks, the terror that flaps in the night,

Have a happy Halloween, smile and don’t be uptight!

Robby headbutts goat over land dispute. Suffice it to say, the goat didn’t make it… In Zimbabwe we don’t keep food as pets. This isn’t some Sunday afternoon Disney Channel with cute cuddly animals that will live to old age and never make it to the dinner table. This is Africa. TIA Mofos!!!!

"Zimbabwe is mine...."

“I will never, never, never never surrender. Zimbabwe is mine, I am a Zimbabwean. Zimbabwe for Zimbabweans. Zimbabwe never for the British, Britain for the British…”

“I won’t be intimidated. Even if I am threatened with beheading, I believe this and nothing will ever move me from it: Zimbabwe belongs to us, not the British.”

“I don’t know whether this inclusive government is going to work or not”

“My view is that those who run the MDC have given the MDC the impression that Zimbabwe is collapsing. ‘Let it collapse and the leadership will vanish and you take over…”

“If they want to wait they can wait. That day will never come.”

“…be wary of the enemy who was devising new ways of destroying ZANU-PF from within”

Thank you for being a friend
Traveled down the road and back again
Your heart is true your a pal and a confidant.

And if you threw a party invited everyone you ever knew
You would see the biggest gift would be from me
And the card attached would say thank you for being a friend.

You are all we have

During the First Chimurenga War between 1896-1897 , Kirsty Coventry was a member of the Rhodesian Women’s Auxiliary Army Corps, and later worked as a CIO agent. She became a friend and later alleged girlfriend of Army Private Robert Gabriel Mugabe, unaware of his dual identity as Captain Zimbabwe and then Prime Minister of the “Houses of Stone”.

She later changed her name to Mbuya Nehanda — the name of the Rhodesian colonial-era woman to whom the disputed and unproven legend ascribes the sewing of the first Rhodesian flag — by the time that Captain Zimbabwe’s sidekick, Sy Dogg “The Drooler” (Simon Muzenda) was shot and wounded he was forced to reveal his civilian identity to Coventry and trained her as his new partner, the costumed water crime-fighter “Golden Girl”.

After a handful of adventures and broken world records, culminating in a battle with Morgan Tsvangirai in June 2008, Coventry left Robert for a much younger man in the U.S. and now swims for her former beloved country having retired from the Superhero business. She occasionally goes back home to collect briefcases of cash, money that is being used to fight the Western World…..

Coventry has never aged since 1896 because she is taking an ancient Zimbabwean Muti, a traditional medicine that cannot be detected by the IOC or FBI, which has led to her great success in the swimming pool…

by Strychnos spinosa (Facebook Friday, September 5, 2008 at 1:44pm)

At least there is a 90% adult literacy level !!!

Things to expect when you go to Zimbabwe:

1. 28 years of President Robert Mugabe.Isn’t Beyonce about 28? Good times !!!
2. A low life expectancy…Females 34 years and men 37 years…In other words, I will be dead in 4 years.
3. Hyperinflation. The paper the money is printed on is more valuable than the money itself.
4. Cholera. August 2008…Zimbabwe hit by Cholera epidemic and about 1000 people dead, and counting.
5. Gas shortages. Good thing actually… At least you cannot drive yourself off a cliff.
6. Food shortages. You don’t have energy to kill yourself or push anyone off a cliff in a car without gas.
7. HIV/AIDS. As if the cholera wasn’t enough. The lack of energy from starvation will mean less sex.Nice.
8. Water shortages, no electricity. At home you will be sitting in the dark, thirsty and smelly. Cool beans!
9. There is a light at the end of the tunnel…A 90% literacy level
10. 11. & 12. Confiscated by the International Monetary Fund (IMF)!!This year will be a short Christmas…

                                                                                                                  The Pinto (12.13.2008)